An Open Letter to my Son...

My middle son Darren just turned 21 this past week. So we all gathered around his bed early in the morning and did the typical Welday birthday tradition of bringing him Dunkin Donuts and milk to have in bed while we all sing him this goofy birthday song to a tape. Yes, the song is so old it’s on cassette. I think we've been playing that silly song on his birthday since he was about three years old. In addition to presents and well wishes, I wanted to say something to Darren that would hopefully be more meaningful and from my heart. I decided to share part of the letter with you here.

Dear Darren,

Well, it’s your 21st birthday, a great milestone! The world says you are now “officially” an adult, a man. You can drink and drive (just not at the same time), vote, go to war, earn a living, raise a family. Congratulations. As your father, I am so proud of you. From all that I observe, you are conducting yourself with honor and representing with distinction both the Welday name and the name of Christ.

I tried to think of some helpful or insightful words I could offer you that would be meaningful. Being a real man is so much more than being able to reproduce, vote or drink. Being a man is about embracing the purpose that God has for your life, it’s about accepting the responsibility of allowing His Spirit to operate fully inside you, guiding and directing you in the way you are called to go. When you hear the phrase “Man up”, that speaks about accepting the challenge, the responsibility of manhood. The apostle Paul put it this way, “when I became a man, I put away childish things…” Interestingly that Scripture comes from 1 Corinthians 13, the “love chapter” where love is so eloquently defined. In other words, part of being a man is about embracing the ability to love the way God intends, selflessly, courageously, uncompromisingly. Not quite how the culture would define manhood is it? As you mature, you will see more and more how the values and principles you stand for are in conflict from the culture in which you live. The solution in my opinion is not to run and hide…but rather to let your light shine Darren. Burn brightly for Jesus! Live boldly, nobly and be willing to stand out…and stand up for the Truth.

I took the opportunity to look back on the words that I shared with you when we marked the season in your life when you became a man. Remember that ceremony we had for you up in the woods of Maine? As I reread the words I gave you back then I found them still to be true and worthy of remembering. So I’ve added them here in this letter…(click here if you want to read the seven points I shared in the letter).